I lied on my resume. Now I’m just trying to survive with ChatGPT and caffeine.

I said I had more coding experience than I actually did. Just enough to land the job. Figured I’d figure it out along the way.

Most of my workday now involves Googling errors, feeding bugs into ChatGPT, and acting like I totally expected that output. My browser history is a mess of “fix this now please” and “what is this error even saying.”

I’ve basically taught myself how to code on the job. Which really just means I’ve become good at sounding like I know what I’m doing. When coworkers ask about my code, I give them a confident explanation filled with just enough buzzwords to sound legit.

And somehow… it worked. I got a raise. I got promoted. Which I guess means I’m getting paid to be calm, convincing, and very fast at asking ChatGPT for help without anyone noticing.

Honestly? Terrified, but thriving.