Are you a people pleaser?

Do you feel a pit in your stomach when you have to say no to someone? 

Someone asks you to do something for them you don’t really want to do, and even though you don’t want to do it, you start rationalizing why it’s ok to say yes. 

Sound familiar? If this sounds like you, you may be a people-pleaser. 

First, there’s no shame in this. 

I don’t know about you, but I was often told how important it is not to disappoint others. 😟

In some ways, that allowed me to build a lot of empathy, but in other ways, it’s led to toxic thinking and behaviors. 

In a large part of my life, I’ve felt guilty saying no or doing something that would cause someone else discomfort. 

To add to that, one of my biggest self-saboteurs is my fear of rejection which shows up as people-pleasing. 

I often have a need to be liked because rejection brings up a lot of discomfort for me.

Here’s what I want you to consider if you’re a people-pleaser.

What about disappointing yourself? 

I think this is more harmful than we realize. 

When we don’t observe our boundaries, we disregard our needs. I want you to consider the impact of this. 

How does it make you feel? 

And how do you actually show up from this place? 

You’re probably not showing up as your best self. 

And you’re saying yes to avoid discomfort, not because you actually want to do the thing.

There’s inauthenticity there! 

So next time you have the urge to say yes when you really want to say no, do this: 

• Consider your needs
• How can you say no in a way that feels good? 

If you're looking for more career support, you can watch my new free class, How to find work you love (link in the comments). 

#purpose #careerchange #careercoaching